Holidays are getting close and it's that time of year when you realize you are truly alone. (Not counting kidlet) I still find it amazing that someone will IM and talk to you for several days and you have good conversations until they see your picture. Then, it's like, oh, that's you. They don't IM you anymore and they don't barely talk to you in the chat room you met them at either. I get that not everyone appeals to everyone but I'm not looking for a romantic relationship anymore. I just want someone to talk to when I feel lonely. I still have a few friends that don't mind my looks and still talk to me quite a bit but it's just sad when someone new does it. Not everyone sees beyond the looks and into the heart of a person, I guess. For those few that do and still talk to me, I cherish and value your friendship. A lot.
Holidays and loneliness go hand in hand. It's that time of year when you wish you had most of your family or friends surrounding you and realize you don't or can't. That time of year when everyone pretends all is well but inside they may be slowly dying. Kidlet will be going away this Christmas for three weeks. Three weeks of quiet, being lonely, and sleeping. That's my plan anyway. Don't expect it to change.
