Well, Christmas is over and now comes paying the bills part. Not only did I buy myself a new laptop but I also bought a new tower. Both are upgrades from what I have and will run on Vista (which I like, by the way). I think I got a good deal for both of them. Total cost was only 1400.00 for both. Computers are sure getting cheap these days.

Kidlet is back from Oklahoma. Went and fetched her today. I'm tired and sore as well. I decided to move furniture around Friday night by myself. Remind me next time to hire someone...haha.

I have to work tomorrow but off on New Year's Day. I hope everyone has a happy New Year!!!

I'm still alive and well contrary to most opinions (my own). Took the kidlet to Lawton on Saturday and missed all the snow!!! I'm glad I got up at 3am in order to leave by 4am. We arrived at 8:30am and I was heading back home by 9:30am. My friend texted me and said it started snowing at 11! Whew, I'm good, eh? I'm off for the next two days and plan on staying home. Between driving to Oklahoma, shopping, and going south to my sister's, I'm tired. My new laptop is supposed to arrive tomorrow so I'll have a toy to play with too. I've also been book shopping and I'm all stocked up for a reading frenzy. I'm in heaven!!! Merry Christmas everyone!!!

Bored...bored...bored!

I'm sitting at work bored out of my mind. So far I've read half of "The Stand" for the fifth time. I guess it beats being outside in the cold though. Kidlet is ready for Xmas and getting excited. I ordered her the following: sixth season of Smallville, first season of Kyle XY, a pair of PJs, and some kind of electronic teaching toy (I forget which one at the moment). She may be going to OK for Xmas again this year. My friend says she wants her there. Life is going okay so far. Hope everyone's elses is too...

It was a dark and dismal day...

Okay...not so dark. It is pretty dismal outside today though. I looked at the radar and noticed all that snow up North and wished it was here. At least once would be nice. Snow to last the weekend then be gone. Maybe we will get more this year, who knows? Otherwise its rainy, cold, and good napping weather. Now if kidlet would let me sleep : )

Different things ...

It was an odd Thanksgiving this year. First, it was only the kidlet and I because Lauren and BJ decided to go hunting in Canada. Last I heard, they still haven't killed anything. Kidlet and I had Tacos on Thanksgiving day and I finally cooked the bird on Friday. It just didn't feel like Thanksgiving. I am thankful I have a job, my health (so to speak), kidlet is pretty healthy (if we could get rid of her cough), have a roof over our heads, and food in our bellies. What more could we ask for, right? I guess I've always been a bah humbug during holiday times. Even as a kid, I would hide in the closet and only come out under duress or when my Mom dragged me out by the arm thus feeling as if my shoulder had come undone. Christmas is the worst by far. I just don't like it. It's never been my dream Christmas where the family all comes together and actually enjoys each other's company. I don't talk to my younger sister at all. Older sister, I talk to her, but we aren't as close as we should be. My parents are gone. They weren't exactly the glue to hold us together when they were alive though. I didn't put up a tree last year and if I can get away with it, I won't this year. Fortunately, kidlet hasn't a clue as to which day Christmas falls on and if she doesn't receive a lot of presents, it doesn't bother her. I just want January to get here. NOW. Let's skip December altogether, okay?

To all that read my blog (when I write something)...

HAPPY THANKSGIVING!!

Funeral services are tomorrow morning for my friend at 10am. Fortunately, those at work who would like to go are allowed to do so. I'm still bummed. Apparently he was shot in the back by a 55 year old man. In the back! Which to everyone means he was walking away from the altercation. We still don't understand why the man felt so threatened he had to shoot him in the back. Maybe we will never know.

Dying young...

I got word yesterday morning that a 25 yr old man that used to work with me was fatally shot early Saturday morning. Such a loss and waste of a good life. I feel for his mother for none should ever outlive their child. I hope they have the guy that shot him and he pays well for his misdeed. You will be missed, Billy!!!

Yes, it's true. I'm still alive! Not much going on lately. Working hard at work tryinng to fit three warehouses into one. Joy, Joy. Enjoying this fanstatic weather we've been having the past few weeks, although my toes are slightly cold right now. Kidlet is doing good. My mood is slowly improving. Just another day of life : ) Happy Saturday!

I know I've not been posting here much lately. I think...okay, I know...I'm depressed. I'm trying to not let it overcome me and swallow me whole like it usually does. I don't like it when these dark moods come on me. I think between job stress, lack of companionship, money problems, and whatever else life seems to throw at me, it's finally wearing me down. I've been taking a break from being online. Not on AOL as much either. Bear with me and I'll be my perky self soon hopefully. Until then, you might see a few dark missives while I try to sort myself out. Happy Saturday!

Have you ever had an online friend that just disappeared on you? I've had several and I often wonder what has happened in their lives that they just cease to exist. I have a friend that used to read this blog so I'm hoping this message gets to him since he hasn't answered my emails since Easter. Scott..if you are reading this, I hope you are doing well and I miss our book chats. I know life sometimes carries a person down a different path and I hope whatever path you are taking, you are doing well. Take care and God Bless... Scott.

Should I be excited??? I got a 50 cent raise! Now if I could get rid of this Mother of all headaches!

I am posting this on an iPhone. My daughter, Lauren, gave me her 4gb phone and bought herself the 8gb one. How cool is that?? I also had a review at work today that they will turn in to the new company. I made a 32 out of possible 40. I wanted to be perfect!!

Still here. Still nothing to say. Not much going on really. Waiting on job to find out what's going on. One year will be on Thursday..so we will see. Kidlet is doing good. I'm trying to lose weight (again). Still breathing!!!

I've not been very good at writing on here lately. I just don't really have anything to say. I've been depressed (sort of) but that's par for the course I think (still blaming hormones) and have been trying not to WHINE as I usually do on here. Work is still work. Slow as molasses on some days and semi-busy on others. Still waiting till October to see if we are even staying open. I think that's what most of us are doing. Trying to get what little bit of employment we can till they make a decision. October 10th is the year of being a new company and when some contracts run out for a few of the bigwigs there. I'll keep you posted... : )

I wish at times I could quit caring about people who don't care about me... sighs.

Still here...still counting down days at work till we find out if we stay open or not. Still stressing and the usual stuff... nothing new to report. : )

Grrrr...

Finding two books you want and can't get them yet...maddening!!!

I was thinking today..

Yea, I know. I really shouldn't do that, right?
There are a few people out there that find themselves in a point of their life where they see no options. No way out. No end of the rainbow. During these times it's hard to dig yourself out of the black bottomless hole you find yourself in. Some drink. Some use drugs. Some just try to end it all. For good. I reached an epiphany during a time in my life when all went black. I swore no matter how my life went from then on, it would never end in that black hole again. So far, I've managed to hang on to edge and just scream once in a while. Anyway..before I started rambling, I was thinking about a friend of mine. I haven't told him this. I may not. The reason I like him so much is because he knows the quiet desperation when you reach that point in your life. He KNOWS. He also, like me, dug himself out and has managed to hang on. A connection if you will. Kindred souls both trying to either pretend life is always fabulous or convincing themselves it really is. I just know he makes me laugh and I need that a lot sometimes. A whole lot. I hope he stays my friend for many years to come. He just doesn't know what that laughter means to me. He really doesn't.

Do you ever???

Wake up some mornings and wonder which way your life will go today? Wonder if this is the direction it's suppose to be going or is there some surprise down the road awaiting you? Life seems mundane at times. Get up, go to work, come home, and repeat the process all over again each and every day. In the meantime you try to fill in any empty places with times of joy and laughter. If you succeed, you are left with a warm glow that fills your heart and enables you to go back to your routine...one day at a time.