Final count ALMOST done...

I am trying to play catch up on paperwork. My count so far is 790 record requests for Aug..and I'm not done yet with it!!!!

Oops, I did it again...

Okay, I broke down and once again rejoined the land of OZ, yes Oz, otherwise known as AOL! I don't know what came over me. Perhaps with winter coming sometime soon, I hope, I feel the call of lonely cold nights where I need more to entertain me than a gaming site. I will stick to my guns this time though and not be on so much as I used to be before I left it in June. I will be more cautious about those I chat with in IMs and not believe a word that anyone tells me (men) unless they can back it up with tangible proof. Maybe I just need some way to relax from my HOT working days in sauna-like conditions. The hospitals I do searches for are trying to kill me, I swear they are truly trying. I spent Monday and Tuesday of this week looking for 100 (already filmed records, mind you) to send out on this coming Tuesday's run. Four hours, eight boxes, and soaking myself with sweat later, I found them all. Yesterday, Friday, I recieved an order for 27 records for another hospital. Now, yet another hospital, informs me that I will be sent a request for about 60 records on Monday. My record so far for finding things is 950 done this past January. So far I am up to 579 just for August. Think I will pass my record?? Not if it kills me first....

Today is not a good day....sighs

I got four hours of sleep last night. If that much. My daughter is being demanding this morning. I am feeling angry. Very angry. Tired...so so tired. Tired of always catering to her because she can't do some things for herself. Tired of always hearing, "Mom" every five minutes. It's just the day, it will pass but for now...I just want to cry.

Worrying is like a rocking chair: it gives you something to do, but it doesn't get you anywhere.-Unknown

What? me worry? NEVER
If I inherited anything at all from my Mother, it is my ability to worry a situation to death. I am trying though as I grow older to learn that unless I can change something, worrying over it is useless. Panicking, now, that is a whole other story....

I saw a quote this morning....

Life is ten percent what happens to you and ninety percent how you respond to it.-Lou Holtz

I often think, wonder, and dream of which direction my life would go if things had been different or if I let myself be different. A friend emailed me something the other day and it was one of those chain letter things that said, "How to say I love you to a friend". He told me to pass it on to my many friends. I had to write him back and say, "could I just send it back to you?" Too often I find myself in spots like that. I have to admit that my "friends" circle is rather small. I have, maybe, five friends online that I would really call friends. In life, I have work acquaintances. Perhaps I could call them friends too, I guess. I think if I had my life to do over again, I would be more outgoing. More brave. Less of a loner. Problem is, I'm not unhappy being alone. I get lonely sometimes but I'm not unhappy being with just me. On days like today, when my head starts to ache, I'm feeling weepy, and I'm fighting the urge to sign back onto AOL just to look around again..I have to tell myself, "it will pass". This urge to be something I'm not. Someone I'm not. Unless I respond to the urge and see what happens....

It's Me..

I'm still here. It's been so hot and torturous in the warehouses this past week that I come home, shower, and fall out on the bed. I find myself moving only under duress. I'm getting too spoiled. I like air conditioning! Nothing new to report except kidlet has a cough. Doctor says he "thinks" it's due to allergies but did take a chest x-ray of her. She also had blood taken for a thyroid test because she's lost about 40 lbs within this past year with no changes happening in her lifestyle. I wish MOM could do that! Hopefully the results will come back okay and we can chalk it up to her losing her babyfat. She is 18 now and should've thinned out some. She'll always have that gut, it's part of what she has, but her legs and arms are much thinner now. I'm proud of my 7 lb loss. I only have ...ummm... 30 more lbs to go.

I've been reading the news...

Yesterday it was Turkeys down all over the road, today penquins??? What is going on around our Texas roads??? I know some of our roads are, how shall we put it, less than desirable? but to slaughter poor Turkeys and then hapless helpless penquins? Wait! What in the heck are penquins doing coming to Texas anyway??? Don't they know its 100 + degrees out there right now. Oh wait, they get the AC when many people can't afford it around our state. I forgot...my bad.

I've refrained but it's time...

I've purposely not stated anything in here about the whole Mel Gibson fiasco but everywhere you go, you read or hear people yapping about it. The media isn't helping, really. True he should not have said anything about Jews. True, he APOLOGIZED. Are we such a nation that we don't have forgiveness anymore? Do we just drain out every bit of someone's mistake and make it tenfold because we are happy to see someone of such stature fall? Personally, I think he should be forgiven. If it makes the Jewish community happy, reach out to him and teach him some of your beliefs. The reasons why it's important to fight for your beliefs. There is no more tolerance in this world. People are quick to anger and just as quick to NOT forget. I think that's one of the good points of my mind slowly going at times. I forget things. I forget what I'm mad about. I know I'm mad but it's hard to stay that way if you don't remember how you got there in the first place. Learning to let go and accepting that people are not perfect is one way to put an end to anger. How many times have you said something that you wished you had not????